Tag Archives: home

In Suspense and Incomplete

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I wrote this post a year ago reflecting on what had been three years of living in Nashville. Reading it now it feels almost a bit self-prophetic.

“It might be time for you to go. It might be time to change, to shine out.
I want to repeat one word for you:
Leave.” (Donald Miller)

Returning home to Nashville after 11 days of traveling earlier this week I was unnerved by my lack of excitement. I couldn’t wait to be home, but for the first time in as long as I can remember my soul wasn’t longing to be back in Nashville.

I walked into my apartment hoping for that “ahhhh, I’m home” feeling. I’m still waiting. I missed my friends, sure, but not in the way I used to. I was glad to be sleeping in my own bed, but that could’ve been in any city. I was happy to be back in the Southern part of this grand country but just so that I could say y’all without getting funny looks and even strangers would be hospitable. But a certain giddiness about returning home was missing.

Is it possible that I’m falling out of love with this city that has been such an instrumental part of my story? That’s a scary question to ask aloud. Because the truth is, I want to be giddy about returning home here. I want it to still feel like home. I want it to be the place where I feel like I belong.

So what do you do when you’re living somewhere between before and not yet? How do you find peace for your soul living in limbo as it senses change coming without a clue what that means or looks like.

Perhaps there is nothing to do but continue living, and waiting for the next step, knowing that you’ve survived leaving before and you can do it again.

“Give our Lord the benefit of believing
that his hand is leading you,
and accept the anxiety of feeling yourself
in suspense and incomplete.” – Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Where Dreams Flourish

Home. That’s always been somewhat of an abstract, whimsical…almost fairytale-like concept for me. Something that deep down I think I longed for but didn’t ever believe I would have.

Growing up with divorced parents was a life of multiple addresses. I added another to that list when I moved away from home to go to high school. And yet another for college. At one point I think my checking account had one address, my driver’s license another, my car registration a different one yet…and none of them were the actual address of where I was living. (You might be understanding why “home” didn’t seem like a very concrete idea.)

Then I visited Nashville. 72 hours later back in Wisconsin I was homesick for this city – for the spirit of this city.

Most days this place feels so much like home I hardly know what to do with it. I can’t believe I haven’t lived here all of my life. There are days I still awake waiting to violently wake up from a dream. Life today far exceeds anything I could have ever dreamed up because it is outside the box of anything I knew for so long.

I’ve discovered in this process, that something happens to our dreams when not only our hearts but our feet find a place that feels like home – they flourish. They flourish because we’re no longer putting our hope in them to “get us somewhere.”

When we come home our dreams are free to follow. They may hand us a map but we’re free to lead them in the direction we want to go. That’s hard to do when you’re wandering around lost looking for home as you drive in circles.

Has your heart found a place that feels like home? A word to the wise – community has more to do with that than location. It’s about cultivating relationships to surround yourself with a spirit that encourages the unconventional & champions dreamers. 

 

Throwback Sundays…There’s No Place Like Home

I have been waiting to bring back this post in a Throwback Sunday. A year ago today, I wrote this…

“There’s no place like home.” Or is there? What is “home” after all? Where is it?
I’m sitting here in an apartment that I love with the sun shining in. It’s beautiful.
But in my hand I hold a cup of Drew’s Brews coffee.
And today, it’s taking me back to Nashville where I spent most of this past week. And my heart is sad, a piece of it almost feels empty. Is it possible that a place you have spent less than 72 hours in can feel like home?
Today, I think it is. And to be honest, it’s not a good feeling. I don’t know what God is up to in my heart but I sure can’t wait to figure it out.
Where is “home” for you? Is it more than one place?

Today, Nashville IS home. I’ve been here 6 months. I’ve seen a couple of seasons come and go.

And I still love it. But it’s the people here that make it home. Without a doubt.

Throwback Sundays…Spring Cleaning Treasure

I’m extremely happy to be back home in Nashville after visiting my family in Minnesota for ten days. But, I’ve also had an itch to travel lately…road trip, air trip, I’m not really picky at this point…I just want to go :)

Looking back at this post makes me want to go all the more! My first venture into the blogging world and a ton of happy life-long memories. :)

If you were given a free ticket to the destination of your choice tomorrow, where would you want to go?

There’s No Place Like Home

“There’s no place like home.” Or is there? What is “home” after all? Where is it?

I’m sitting here in an apartment that I love with the sun shining in. It’s beautiful.

But in my hand I hold a cup of Drew’s Brews coffee.

And today, it’s taking me back to Nashville where I spent most of this past week. And my heart is sad, a piece of it almost feels empty. Is it possible that a place you have spent less than 72 hours in can feel like home?

Today, I think it is. And to be honest, it’s not a good feeling. I don’t know what God is up to in my heart but I sure can’t wait to figure it out.

Where is “home” for you? Is it more than one place?