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The “R” Word…Again

August 11, 2010 in Just Life, Relationships


At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I’m going to talk about the “R” word again. Yes, I’m referring to relationships. It’s a risk I’m willing to take because I become more convinced with every passing day just how vital relationships are. For me they are both the foundation and the thread that connect all of the pieces of life together.

But, in spite of that, I fail to give them the respect and time they deserve. The reasons for that are too many to list, but most, if I’m honest, are really just terrible excuses. I talk a lot about being intentional and last week I decided it was time I be intentional with relationships as well. For me, this means putting relationships in my “to-do” list. I know this may sound terrible. But, we schedule everything else in our lives, why not time to be intentional about relationships? I think we also need to be intentional with the relationships we invest in, but more on that later.

I use Things as my task-management system and love it. So, I created a new “area of responsibility” called Relationships. I currently have six different communication tasks scheduled in there with six different people. I can set them up to repeat every week, once a month, or anywhere in between. Sad as it may be I can simply get so “busy” with the day to day pace of life that I forget to connect with the people I care about most.

My hope is that being intentional about relationships becomes so much a rhythm of my life that I no longer need to put it in my “to-do” list. But, until then, I need the reminders.

Do you have any tips to share on how to be more intentional about relationships?

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Age is a Funny Thing

August 9, 2010 in Deep Thinking, Just Life, Relationships

Here in America we live in a culture that gets offended when you ask about it…age. Personally, it’s the tone with which people ask the question that gets me. More often than not, when people first meet me they assume I’m younger than I am (and then they tell me that one day I’ll wish that was the case). Apparently I look young. I’m okay with that. What I’m not okay with is people looking down on me because of my age. I find this to be the case often in the church. Why that’s the case I haven’t yet been able to figure out. But, it’s not anything new either.

Yes, I am (by comparison) young. I have a lot to learn. Sometimes my passion needs to be reigned in a little bit. I am still at times naive. Sometimes I’m overeager. My passion and excitement can cause me to be judgmental. Bottom line: I make mistakes…a lot of them.

But, I’m also a loved and uniquely gifted child of God. And I respect the older generation. I respect their wisdom and knowledge. I admire their leadership. I can learn more from them than I’d ever imagine. And I crave mentors from among them.

Many churches today have become divided by age, by generation. And we are all to blame for that. In doing so I think we’re losing out on some extremely valuable relationships. We’re losing opportunities for cross generational mentoring and learning. Whether 15, 25, 35, 65 or anywhere in between, we’re all a piece of the puzzle. God has given us all unique gifts to be used for His kingdom. And the truth is that none of us can do it on our own. In fact, more often than not I think God can use us to accomplish the most for Him when we work together.

It’s a beautiful thing when we can forget about age and open ourselves up to relationships that can make a lasting impact on our lives and the Kingdom. It’s a lesson I’m learning…not using age as a defining fact in what relationships should or should not look like.

Thoughts?

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Taking the Online Offline

August 4, 2010 in Deep Thinking, Just Life, Relationships

Relationships. One simple word, but one word that can make or break or so much. One word that demands our focus and attention whether we like it or not. One word that God called us to – with Him and with others.

In a society where we live so much of our time online our view of relationships can become quite distorted if we’re not careful. We can develop a community that is a mile long but only an inch deep.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that relationships cannot be built or fostered through online interaction. What I am saying, however, is that we can’t let it stop there. If we do, we’re missing out. We’re missing out on depth and growth in community. We have to take the online offline.

I’ve always been a firm believer in that – taking the online offline, but my time at the Echo Conference last week reaffirmed that. Sharing a meal and great conversation or staying up well past 2am talking about life, ministry and the church is something that you just can’t duplicate online.

So here’s to being intentional about seizing opportunities to take the online offline…to have a face to face conversation with someone who you normally associate with a tiny square picture on a screen. And here’s to intentionally using the online tools to continue the relationships when distance makes offline impossible.

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Different Eyes

August 2, 2010 in Deep Thinking, Missions, Relationships

A couple of weeks ago I read this: “…the experience of many travelers today, who compose their experience through camera lenses as they go and then take the pixelated images home with them in place of memories,” in this article: “Too Many Lenses, Too Few Eyes.”

A couple of days ago I listened to photographer Esther Havens speak at the Echo Conference and was challenged and inspired. Three thoughts she shared stuck with me:

1. Don’t just go to tell stories, be a part of the story.

2. Are you doing a job or connecting with people?

3. Awareness without action is pointless.

The full connection of these two things is still processing in my head and I don’t know exactly what it means. But, I do know that I am challenged and inspired to do something about what I see and what I know…and to see with different eyes…eyes that are not always my own.

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Tribes vs. Movements

July 19, 2010 in Deep Thinking, Leadership, Relationships

I read Seth Godin’s Tribes when it first came out, but recently decided I needed to re-read it. In the season of life I’ve found myself in “tribes” seem to be playing a big role. I’ve found a place in several different tribes of varying sizes. Tribes where I’ve found community, friends, & mentors. I’m also, somewhat begrudgingly, coming to the realization that whether I like it or not & whether I consider myself one or not, God may be calling me to be a leader within a tribe. And so, back to the basics I’m going.

I haven’t finished the book a second time yet, but in just the first few pages something struck me – the difference between a tribe & a movement. I think we often confuse or equate the two.

Godin defines a tribe as “a group of people connected to one another, connected to a leader, and connected to an idea.” A few pages later in the book Godin says, “Every one of those [stuck] tribes, though, is a movement waiting to happen, a group of people just waiting to be energized and transformed…A movement is thrilling. It’s the work of many people, all connected, all seeking something better.”

You see, a tribe is not a movement. All that’s required to be a tribe is to exist with commonality. A tribe communicates with itself. A movement communicates with the world…through action. A movement requires action…a movement is a tribe in action…a tribe in action creates a movement.

And the world needs more than tribes, it needs movements. It needs people who step out in faith and do something…together.

Sidenote: I found the image above in a Flickr photo group for To Write Love on Her Arms –  a tribe that has created a movement of love. Check out what they’re doing here.

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